Last night Entertainmentwise was lucky enough to bag a ticket to the hottest gig in town: The Brit Awards! Needless to say, we were just a BIT excited! (Or should that be a BRIT? - comedy ed).
So, off we tottered to the O2 and after such an excellent evening we thought it only right to thank The Brit 2012 for awarding us with such a night with our very own acceptance speech in the form of our top 12 moments… Sadly spotting Jane Torville in the loo,just failed to make make the top 12, sadly…
1) Firstly we would like to thank Florence Welch and her many dresses. OK, two, but it’s not every day a lady has TWO dresses by the chick who stitched THE Royal Wedding Dress amde for her. Yes, Sarah Burton’s designs were hot news and judging by the dance moves Florence was throwing over by her table they must be awfully practical… Another big plus.
2) Secondly, Adele. Oh let us count the ways we love her. Firstly, she was on a table with Sid Owen, yes as in Ricky off Eastenders (they are best mates appaz) and if that’s not enough, Alan Carr was with her too. A stunning celebrity mixture by anyone’s standards. Secondly, it would appear whatever was wrong with her throat is solidly in the past after that beautiful performance. Thirdly, she looked gorgeous and we really want to know exactly what is in her make up bag because whatever it is, we need it. But as much as we love happy Adele, we also enjoyed…
Adele and her Brits
3) Angry Adele. The lady gives a stunning performance, wins a load of awards and how do The Brits thank her? By shoving her off stage before she is even allowed to thank her mum and pet hamster. Unforgiveable. BAD CALL, BRITS, BAD CALL. Instead, they give Blur about half an hour to reel off everyone they ever encountered, anywhere, ever, and do four songs which sound like something one may run into on the last train home when the football’s been on.
4) A special mention to Adele’s middle finger which, following her interruption, made an unexpected, yet brilliantly effective, MIA-inspired cameo appearance. It did what we were all thinking.
5) We also couldn’t have done it without Rihanna’s thighs. Everyone thought she was going to be all hungover after she ‘celebrated her birthday’ the night before but she pulled through and got the room jumping. Well, she got Florence Welch jumping anyway, literally. Still in her lovely dress, Florence was leaping about like a sequined gazelle down the front. Alas, none of her fellow table dwellers would join in. They're probably all far too cool for jumping. Also, while on the subject of Riri, when she won Best International Female, we spotted Ed Sheeran nudging his mate as she went past his table. It’s alright Ed, we think she’s fit too.
6) We would also like to mention the fitting tributes to Whitney Houston and Amy Winehouse who were both honoured individually during the show. But dare we say, they felt a little short. But this was BEFORE Adele’s acceptance speech for Best Album…
7) Big thanks to the possibly overlooked Harry Styles’ awkward hello to Caroline Flack. We spied the pair bump into each other and have one of the most awkward hugs we’ve seen in a while. The meeting was fleeting and Harry seems to have found new love in the arms of Ed Sheeran. We spotted Harry hanging out at Ed’s table for much of the evening and noticed their simultaneous hair ruffling: mirroring each other’s body language: it must be love!
8) Shout out to Bruno Mars who it turns out, is even smaller than Kylie in the flesh. Honestly, we had no idea men came so small. And while on the subject of men we fancy, is it weird that we find Rizzle Kicks quite hot? And Jack Whitehall?
9) If we could take this opportunity to check in on Nicole Scherzinger who got rather caught up in Blur mayhem. For some reason unknown, Ms Scherzinger decided to leave the auditorium in the middle of Blur’s set, meaning she, with the aid of about four helpers, had to wrestle their way past a raving Fearne Cotton and a moshing One Direction. No one was giving up good party, even for a Pussycat Doll.
10) Just simply: Rob Brydon and will.i.am. Whoever thought of putting these two together is a genius, they deserve their very own award. Wow, here is a formula that works. Can someone PLEASE get them a chat show asap…OR maybe they could just host next year?!
11) And finally, we know we can’t all be winners but that didn’t make that awkward moment when Jessie J does a bit of a Craig David and wins no awards any easier…But at least she had a very lovely, nice red dress on even if we could see her bum through it.
Oh and P.S:
12) Are we the only ones who are a bit disappointed that Foo Fighters couldn’t even be bothered to accept their award EVEN via video tape? No Dave Grohl to be seen, instead we just got Taylor Hawkins. If Adele can make it to The Grammys then Dave can wave at a webcam…
BRIT Awards Red Carpet Arrivals